I think the biggest thing I learned from reading this article was that putting too many details and covering too large of a span of time creates a summary over a scene. As I revised my rough draft I tried to edit out words such as always, would, and sometimes as these signal events that aren’t in the exact moment, but rather things that have happened at one time or another. It’s important to be specific, to talk about one night or event that is happening at a precise time. This was somewhat difficult for me because the Christmas party I wrote about is approximately the same every year. I was able to turn my focus to specific moments by recalling events and dialogue that happened at one specific party. I tried to hone in on a rather sensitive topic, the passing of my grandmother. I felt I was following the article by describing a scene in an attempt to slow time down. This detailed event only took a minute or two in real life, but by giving details and adding dialogue I hoped the reader would wonder the outcome. I know I was guilty of trying to cram too much into my rough draft, so I tried to focus on single moments that showed what I felt home was like rather than tell. In conclusion, I would like to continue to work on editing my thoughts to create more of a sensory scene rather than a story.